Boundaries and Toxic Relationships with Stacey Speller

Creating Healthy Boundaries

Everyone seemed to have tested their boundaries in 2022 and removed or distanced at least one toxic person from their lives. By reflecting on others’ unacceptable behavior, we can become less prone to letting our boundaries be pushed. Those past traumas and beliefs that keep us stuck in unhealthy relationships or patterns with ourselves are starting to heal.

In the last year, more people have looked inward and let go of people who didn’t honor their beliefs. No longer accepting someone else’s unacceptable behavior can help you come from a dysfunctional childhood or relationship and reclaim your worth with yourself.

Did 2022 Test You?

“You’ve gotta be kidding me!” I YELLED.

2022 I’ve labeled as the Year of the Reckoning. Everyone I know had their boundaries tested, and had to distance or remove at least one toxic person from their lives.

How it looks to have your boundaries tested

This happened to me several times this year, leaving me pleading and yelling at God. I was so blown away by people’s unacceptable behavior and my lack of seeing the red flags.

Keep in mind I’ve had thousands of hours of therapy, inner child work, energy healing, and trauma recovery…So I wanted to believe I wouldn’t let my boundaries get crossed, or any abuse occur. HA!

I only laugh because somehow I forgot I was a human who has deep core wounds that will be with me for life. Making it easy to miss the more subtle toxic behaviors, micro-aggressions, and boundary breakers.

Before I knew it, I was accepting unacceptable behavior in my life and in my business. Here’s how it showed up:

Telling myself I need to extend more patience, love, and tolerance to someone who’s struggling.
Avoiding bringing up someone’s unhealthy behavior, because I was “too tired” to deal with more heavy stuff right now.
Convincing myself that I was “too much,” “too needy,” too sensitive, “ and my expectations of friends/employees/people were “too high.”

It is easy to beat ourselves up for what we can easily see in hindsight. When we are standing in the frame, it’s impossible to see the entire picture.

All we can do is make a loving commitment to honor ourselves, and no longer tolerate behaviors, words, actions, or situations that don’t feel good or safe to us.

I’ve brought on a relationship expert (as clearly, I am not one) to help us improve setting boundaries with the people we love and the ones we don’t.

Connect with Stacey:

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